Boasso to Bring Jobs in Shrimp Trucks to North Lousiana

"You know what youse guys' problem is?" 50 points behind gubernatorial candidate Walter Boasso told a crowd of ten or so in Harrisonburg, LA. "You don't got shrimp boils like in Chalmette. When I am governor I am going to make sure the shrimp trucks make it up here. This will result in massive sales of Zaterains at your local food stores and create an economic boom."

In addition to his plan for a shrimp boil boom resulting from the lifting of the tariff from Zaterains, Boasso also stressed his platform of deregulating Mardi Gras truck parades, bringing back Jax beer, and returning Nash and Morgus to TV."

After he left, one local man was heard to say,"We can't drink much beer, our pastor wouldn't allow that. By the way, who the hell is Nash and Morgus?"

Boasso did not mention his policy of making all intersections "No Left Turn" because of recent polls that showed this unpopular in North Louisiana.